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GreenCine Tech Talk
Filmmaker
For the aspiring filmmaker. Director, actor, writer, producer? Share the knowledge.
20

Awesomely bad
Topic by: Cosplayer
Posted: August 23, 2004 - 6:09 PM PDT
Last Reply: November 15, 2004 - 9:45 AM PST

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author topic: Awesomely bad
woozy
post #21  on August 24, 2004 - 10:57 PM PDT  
> On August 24, 2004 - 10:42 PM PDT artifex wrote:
> ---------------------------------
> > On August 24, 2004 - 10:33 PM PDT woozy wrote:
> > Or Bette Middler could play Chumley's mother in TTtmp.
>
> That sounds perfect for Kathy Bates, actually.
> ---------------------------------

Even better.
dh22
post #22  on August 25, 2004 - 5:31 AM PDT  
> On August 24, 2004 - 3:54 PM PDT Catullus wrote:
> ---------------------------------
> Wait a second that sounds a lot like the plot of wing commander the worst movie of all time
>
> I win by default, unless cheating keeps me from winning.
> ---------------------------------

Its ashame. That was actualy a really good game.
woozy
post #23  on August 25, 2004 - 9:13 AM PDT  
> Its ashame. That was actualy a really good game.
> ---------------------------------

Has there ever been a good movie based on a video game? "Crazy Taxi" was optioned a few years ago. Now if only they'd make a movie based on "Pong". Or "Custer's Revenge"?

Cinenaut
post #24  on August 25, 2004 - 10:37 AM PDT  
American Idol: The Movie, starring Cedric the Entertainer as Randy Jackson, Jennifer Lopez as Paula Abdul and Pierce Brosnan as Simon Cowell.

Enroute from a judging competition in Atlanta to another in Houston, the bus breaks down, stranding our intrepid judges in a small Texas town where they rediscover the meaning of life and love among the plucky locals and also find a major new country performer, played by Nicky Hilton (singing voice: Faith Hill).
artifex
post #25  on August 25, 2004 - 10:51 AM PDT  
> On August 25, 2004 - 10:37 AM PDT Cinenaut wrote:
> Enroute from a judging competition in Atlanta to another in Houston, the bus breaks down, stranding our intrepid judges in a small Texas town where they rediscover the meaning of life and love among the plucky locals and also find a major new country performer, played by Nicky Hilton (singing voice: Faith Hill).

That sounds too bad to be fake, though I suspect Graham Norton would be a better (worse?) Simon Cowell.
kamapuaa
post #26  on August 25, 2004 - 3:19 PM PDT  
> Has there ever been a good movie based on a video game? "Crazy Taxi" was optioned a few years ago. Now if only they'd make a movie based on "Pong". Or "Custer's Revenge"?

I thought Resident Evil was good, if not great. I'll watch the sequel unless the reviews are terrible (which I admit is a possibility).
JBellows
post #27  on August 25, 2004 - 4:59 PM PDT  
I remember seeing Milla Jovovich in it when I rented it. What was it about again?

> On August 25, 2004 - 3:19 PM PDT kamapuaa wrote:
> ---------------------------------
> > Has there ever been a good movie based on a video game? "Crazy Taxi" was optioned a few years ago. Now if only they'd make a movie based on "Pong". Or "Custer's Revenge"?
>
> I thought Resident Evil was good, if not great. I'll watch the sequel unless the reviews are terrible (which I admit is a possibility).
> ---------------------------------

kamapuaa
post #28  on August 25, 2004 - 6:14 PM PDT  
> I remember seeing Milla Jovovich in it when I rented it. What was it about again?

Well, Milla Jovovich was in it. What more do you need to be "good if not great"???

I also liked the look of the movie a lot, and thought the first half of the movie (with guns and zombies rather than weird mutants) was pretty cool. The commentary track is hilarious.

It was definitely above "Tomb Raider," which also starred a hot girl, but was so boring.
Cosplayer
post #29  on August 25, 2004 - 8:06 PM PDT  

> Hm. If I wasn't writing a real screenplay right now, one I hope doesn't qualify for this, it's hard for me to think straight (or, crooked).


congrats!
Cosplayer
post #30  on August 25, 2004 - 8:16 PM PDT  
Does it go something like this:

Michal McMacalmalony is your average teen-age football star/chess club coach guy until takes his persciption medecine with vodka, tuning him into...CGI boy! Can a cgi boy live in a world with live actors? Will he make it to second base with Jammie Maloo, or will the evil Retardomalone commit evil acts, and plauge the groovy high school for ever?

(In case you didn't notice, it's a sports movie, and the co-star is an owl.)
sinisterguffaw
post #31  on August 26, 2004 - 11:13 AM PDT  
Cosplayer, are you trying to win your own contest? That's like an olympic judge competing in the very event they're evaluating!

More power to ya!
Cosplayer
post #32  on August 27, 2004 - 2:01 PM PDT  
> On August 26, 2004 - 11:13 AM PDT sinisterguffaw wrote:
> ---------------------------------
> Cosplayer, are you trying to win your own contest? That's like an olympic judge competing in the very event they're evaluating!
>
> More power to ya!
> ---------------------------------

Frankly, I think the judging might die...and this thread is dying too. *sadlynessness*
eifert
post #33  on August 30, 2004 - 6:33 PM PDT  
An over-the-top comedy with Ben Stiller. He's dating Hillary Duff, who's parents hate him. When he attempts to sneak out of a roudy cross-dressing party before being recognized by his in laws(at his bosses house - Dan Ackroyd) he gets bit in the groin by the neighbor's pit bull (Jon Voight).

.... then like the great Psycho, it turns into another movie. Angelina Jolie or Naomi Judd (or if they're really desperate Sandra Bullock or Meg Ryan) shows up as a hard-as-nails female undercover cop/lawyer to investigate the crime. Her partner is the grizzled hard-drinking tough-as-nails Morgan Freeman/Tommy Lee Jones. An investigation reveals that the female star can stare real good into the camera looking shocked. Lots of night time chases through the woods with flashlights. Somehow there's a serial killer living in the woods that's involved. Havent' worked that out yet. His house will be filled with wacky photos taped on the walls with their eyes scratched out.

Ben Affleck shows up. He plays a tough-as-nails FBI agent. He's partnered with Queen Latifa. She's a street-wise tough-as-nails single mother. There's a lot of shots of them turning corners wide-eyed with guns pointing. Wait, it's only a cat. This happens like 15 times.




ALittlefield
post #34  on August 30, 2004 - 9:12 PM PDT  
GILLIGAN'S ISLAND, THE MOVIE, starring Jim Carrey (in the role he was born to play)as Gilligan, Brian Dennehy as the Skipper, Stephen Baldwin(there has to be one!)as the Professor, Angelina Jolie as Ginger, Jennifer Love Hewitt as Mary Anne, an embarassed Sean Connery as Mr Howl (Come on, I like him too, but he was in HIGHLANDER 2, and THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMAN), and following her triumph co-starring wiht Vin Desil in THE CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK, Dame Judi Dench as Mrs. Howl. People who stumble upon the island will have to include Pauly Shore, Keanu Reeves, Claude Von Damme ,Slyvester Stallone, Stephen Segal and Carrot Top(Hey, this is supposed to be the wortst movie ever!)
woozy
post #35  on August 30, 2004 - 11:24 PM PDT  
Darn insomnia. Late night with nothing to do but watch syndicate TV and suddenly it hits me:

Will And Grace: The movie. Same stars. A summer movie between seasons (much like the X-Files movie) but with a few swear words thrown in.

IronS
post #36  on August 31, 2004 - 12:04 AM PDT  
> People who stumble upon the island will have to include Pauly Shore and Carrot Top
>

Add Chris Elliott (Cabin Boy, ICK!!!) to the mix and I'll run screaming from the theater for sure.
sinisterguffaw
post #37  on August 31, 2004 - 8:53 AM PDT  
Cabin Boy 4ever!
woozy
post #38  on August 31, 2004 - 11:32 AM PDT  
> On August 31, 2004 - 8:53 AM PDT sinisterguffaw wrote:
> ---------------------------------
> Cabin Boy 4ever!
> ---------------------------------

That requires a Cabin Boy II (Cabin Boy MAN, Chris' char gets his own command and a commission to deliver a precious nutmeg which is believed to be a powerful hallucinagin when inhaled nasally. Hilarity ensues when through farcical mistakes the cremated remains of Chris' mentor and first captain are mistaken for ground nutmeg and are snorted and Chris believes he is high when he isn't) and Cabin Boy III (Cabin Boy: Back in the barrel. Chris gets a crew position on a new boat now searching for the legendary fountain of youth, knotholes and barrels are mistaken for ... other items and hilarity ensues). And I fear it be followed by Cabin Boy meets Ernest: This time it's personal. With the late what's-his-disgusting-***ing-how-could-any-one-find-this-guy-amusing-face's role replaced by Ray Ramano.

sinisterguffaw
post #39  on August 31, 2004 - 11:39 AM PDT  
And I fear it be followed by Cabin Boy meets Ernest: This time it's personal.
> ---------------------------------

Make it Cabin Boy VS. Ernest from Beyond the Grave, and you've got the makings of a surefire greenlit project!
Bowwow
post #40  on August 31, 2004 - 12:45 PM PDT  
Y'all scare me. Really you do. Such a capacity for thinking up evil!

I think the most horrible movie ever would be to remake Moulin Rouge with Tom Green. Give him creative control of the project and call it "Moulin Rogue"
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