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Member Lists

We ♥ Alien Parasites!
List creator: postmod
Created on: October 22, 2003 - 5:47 PM PDT
Description: A look at a few alien parasites of the silver screen (and their taglines) that we've known and loved over the years.

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Outer Limits - Season 1 (Disc 3 of 4) (1963)
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Not Rated
  There is nothing wrong with your television. Do not attempt to adjust the picture.

"The Invisibles" is possibly the show's finest hour and certainly holds its own with the films on this list.

The Andromeda Strain (1971)
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  The picture runs 130 minutes!... The story covers 96 of the most critical hours in man's history!... The suspense will last through your lifetime!

Alien parasite as deadly virus. Laboratory scientists as suspense stars. Eh.

Parasite (1981)
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  You will not feel the terror until you experience the movie!

"Parasite" has two major cheese factors going for it--it was filmed in 3-D and it has a young Demi Moore in it. What are you waiting for?

The Thing (1982)
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  Man is The Warmest Place to Hide.

A wonderful, relentlessly gloomy, gory, and frightening Arctic alien film that's been ripped off countless times since.

Aliens (1986)
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  There are some places in the universe you don't go alone.

A wonderful, relentlessly gloomy, gory, and frightening mostly underground alien film. More of an action film than the first, and I think it's the best of the four.

The Hidden (1987)
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  A new breed of criminal.

Finally, we have an alien parasite on the side of truth and justice. And he's Special Agent Dale Cooper.

The Puppet Masters (1994)
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  Trust no one.

Sluglike aliens take over the minds of unsuspecting Midwesterners. No one notices any difference...oh ho! just kidding, guys. I love Iowa, and so does outer space.

Sci-Fighters (1996)
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  In the year 2009, they're your only hope.

Canada has alien parasites too. And also straight-to-video king (and former pro wrestler) Roddy Piper.

Alien Resurrection (1997)
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  Beyond salvation.

The Alien franchise goes Eurotrash. The transplanted cast of "City of Lost Children" just didn't work for me, though this may be the most visually stylish of the Alien films.

Men in Black (1997)
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  Protecting the earth from the scum of the universe.

Vincent D'Onofrio's star turn as an insect-alien-reanimated corpse.

Species 2 (1998)
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  Mating season begins...

Look, don't see this, unless Natasha Henstridge really means that much to you. But, just for the record, this sequel features yet another sex-crazed alien-ridden astronaut.

The X-Files: Fight the Future (1998)
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  The Truth Is Revealed.

Even the biggest "X-Files" fan must have winced at the blatant "Alien" rip-off. Better are the oily aliens in the beginning scenes.

Astronaut's Wife (1999)
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  Imagine the face of terror is the one you love.

A sci-fi take on "Rosemary's Baby" sounded so promising...but this is not. But Johnny Depp is hot, and evil, and out to seduce women and spread his evil alien spawn. Hubba-hubba.

The Faculty (1998)
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  Six students are about to find out their teachers really are from another planet.

And we're about to learn that while alien parasites are evil, they don't do drugs. Maybe that's why they're not fun at parties. Also, Elijah Wood.

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (2001)
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  Unleash a new reality.

Remember? Main character CGI was infected by some ominous red, glowing CG thing. At least it all looked pretty.

Dreamcatcher (2003)
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  Four friends hung a dreamcatcher in their cabin. It's about to catch something it cannot stop.

These days, alien parasites are not only silmy and deadly, they give you terrible gas. You're not Jonesy!

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